RIGHT! That’s it!! That’s the last straw! I’m grabbing my flaming torch, rounding up my mates and we’re going up ‘the council’ to ‘let them know what we think’, writes Bridgwater Town Council Leader, Brian Smedley.

Well, I say ‘mates’, there was about 50 of us when we were out-screaming each other on  the ‘Shouty-Mc-Shouty’ Facebook chat group.

Now there was just me and Dave.

Come on Dave. Let’s go!! Oh, your flaming torch has gone out. Right. Look, use this rolled up copy of ‘This is What They’re Like!!’  that came through my door last week.

No, I’ve no idea where it comes from, but it must be reliable because it says ‘All other conspiracy newspapers are conspiracies’ written on it.

Ok here we are. The bloody Council. Gnash! Grr!! There’s one of them, go on shout at her.  

"Good morning sir can I help you?"

Yes, I think you can!! I’ve come to give the council a piece of my mind!! Oh yes!

"Certainly, which council are you looking for sir?"

What? THE council. The BLOODY council!!

"Yes, but there’s more than one and they do different things."

I told you. Shut up Dave! Couldn’t we just write a letter?

Well, we could but I’m not sure I’ve got enough ink to write all the CAPITAL LETTERS I will NEED.

It was much easier on Facebook. Everyone agreed with us. Well, usually. Well, we weren’t always talking about the same thing. Yeah, but they still agreed with us, even though we’d no idea what we were all talking about.

Okay, let’s go.

State of this country though Dave. You can’t even scream abuse at a receptionist just to make yourself feel better.